sometimes you laugh when i say funny things besides that i know there's not much to care about if there's no such thing as love we'd say we thought there was and we'd leave it at that when you-- (what the fuck) she don't worry about me too much anymore i found her pictures out and scattered on the bathroom floor where the trail of stones led me i couldn't say but she found me safe there in your hands (i love you) (i love you) (i love you) (sleeping bag) "caught in a trap of fatal consequence, the heart thief stopped and looked the woman in her eyes. he knew it was coming he just didn't know when. he looked once at the phantom wind in the treetops, then to the gun, and then into the camera, feeling everything all at once, as ghostly fingers--" one last dance i can't connect i'm too fucked up to be here don't look at my face one last dance i can't connect i'm too fucked up to be here don't look at my face i am so ashamed of myself some nights "'there is a hell existing in our daily lives,' the heart theif broke his last words into the night. "and one day you will get there too, and i will know because you will tell me.

he will tell everyone.'" the street signs stood up to all the dark bending down at a broken pile of glass i saw them print my name up on the boards my head is running but my body stands still it's hot and dark and i'm wearing black clothes my friends are dead and the shops are all closed walking up and down empty street looking for someone to tell me where to go when you walk this way you get far enough that there is no turning back and i thought i could recognize that but i'm too far down i'm too far gone i'm too fucked up i'm too far down sometimes, when i feel alone i try to rip the worst parts of me out parade them demons all around the town and lock them up before i come back down then sometimes, when i feel alone i flay big chunks of skin off my face did that make me pretty now? did that make me better now? if you push yourself you'll get far enough that there is no going back and i thought i could recognize that but i'm too far down i'm too far gone i'm too fucked up i'm too far down a feeling like i wanna combust sometimes i wanna self destruct i had a thirst for my own blood are no innocent bystanders when i opened my head on the asphalt when you saw me grinding all my teeth down when you caught me grinding my teeth down if you let yourself get far enough you will never find your way back i thought i could recognize that but i'm too far down please help me up don't leave me here i'm so far down [crowd of people]

all the things you'll never know are the lies you used to doubt you start to see the truth when i open up my mouth but it's too dark to speak i feel you next to me i'm a fucking fool if i can ruin this (if there's a hell it exists for me) (and i'm never coming back again) (if there's a hell it exists for me) (and i'll never get it back again) if there is a hell it exists for me if there is a hell it exists for me if there is a hell it exists for me you told me through grit teeth you told me (if there is a hell) you loved me all the things you'll never know are the myths you used to doubt you cut my giant pupils black and tripping on the couch i was an object i was no match you told me so yourself you slammed the door and broke the latch [total breakdown] more than you'll ever know it watched me as i slept slithered up into the darkest corner and held itself more than you'll ever know i wept as it loomed meaning no harm but holding so tight more than you'll ever know i wept total breakdown total breakdown totalled me "he thinks backwards in milliseconds, a life he could've had, but the spiral he exists in is now. he's hitting the bottom. if only this path extended farther, prolonging his demise. he sees no end, past his deaths he sees no end."

(the party starts without us) he's looking for a ride to the empty side of town he wants to go to sleep kicked up dust from the asphalt sidewalks until he's tired and finds a place to stop there's no breath left in the chest friends have all passed on under a thin slab of concrete withered holding something precious gold buried with the family we'll bury him in time prayers hold their nothing and muscles shrill dissolving makes a sound that only children hear the trauma in their memories kept safe for some great something opened only when there's no one near to fear one day all that concrete will be repurposed and used to build a statue for someone great we will never meet under a grass so green with lyme disease skeletons holding something safe to keep

heart thief don't wake up don't go outside don't think about tomorrow or where you'll be you'll be right here with me (with me until the end of time) dancing in circles whipping your neck back in ecstasy all of me hot silverware every where is nowhere there no sunlight no daylight the moon lit his casket poor dumb boy you're gonna kill yourself can't you see oh come, come dance in circles with me the only way out is up, to your head squeeze that trigger and now you're dead false hope is all you know how to give it's all you can get i lied once and drank for it the lamp lit up the hermit no daylight no moon light no sunshine not here "'you can't get away that easily, this is something you can't run from, no one can run from,' this is what she said before he looked away. he bit the bullet. she buried him next to her dogs in the early morning dirt and heat, and even though she swore she wouldn't, she cried; sitting there on his grave."

they're all on their way out meeting each other alone roll down your windows wind coming in starts to moan overlapping itself falling deep out of time running out of time when they shut down the function we make a break for the hills he flips out his pockets and we start to chewing up pills now he's telling me stories but i can't follow what's real thin walls all surround me and i'm laying my head on the wheel laughing over myself i'm falling deep out of time running out of time i think i'll run away from myself for a while they're all on their way out but some were just here for the wine loose banter and chit chat it makes me start losing my mind crash into the restrooms i lose my whole sense of time white walls all surround me and i get locked in for the night stars and planes overhead and i'm falling deep out of time surround me down in the dark

some god: you'll be free from the addiction, you will lose interest in all relationships tied to the worst parts of your humanity-- tied to the worst parts of your addiction, you will turn your hands inside out and touch your heart. some Sinner: when he looks at the people walking on the sidewalk below his window, he wonders what their lives are like. what is it like to be the black-haired woman on the cell phone? where do the kids on their bikes go to ride when fall ends and winter is here? and just like that winter is here, and there is nobody to think about. and there's nothing to do but drink, and pass out on the pile of mail, and drink, and wake up missing days, and smoke, writing letters you'll never send, and smoke, and wire yourself to the other person stranded in the house, and sleep, and shit, and breathe, and eat where you shit, and don't breathe anymore when you sleep, and run, and lie, and hide, and cry, and burn, and him, and you, and her, and them, and then when, and your, and live, and kiss, and bite, and cut, and fuck, anything but love, and die, and drink, and smoke, and ash, and die, and drink, and smoke, and ash, then it's fall again, hey, it's fall again. some god: you'll be free from all superficial human desire. you'll never worry about your appearance or anyone else's ever again, and all it takes-- you will enter the void kicking and screaming.

waiting for the day to end glued to my little window i'll never make an excuse i won't bother to be there what a waste of time love to fall asleep again nobody can see me undress my wound (i won't bother) waiting for the wait to end nobody can see me forfeit waiting for the blood to stop head's in the toilet my mind's flushed i never made an excuse i didn't break any promise when i wake i'll feel fine love to hold your hand and cry someday they'll take me alive "she keeps it in a shoebox on a shelf in her closet... and one day she'll use it again, or maybe she will bury it with him, next to her dogs, next to her family, with her heart, and her memories. we kill the things we love when we have to before they swallow us alive. this hell we exist in knows no ending in death, just as her memories will feel no ending in death,

just as the heart thief will breathe his words into the night air, beyond death, once again..." don't cut away yet i'm still getting up from the night you threw most of my shit out in the yard it's a sight to behold at 11 years old and it's one that he keeps in his chest one day i'll be framed on a mantle with her our legs hang down kicking the curb so what, we lie through our teeth to everybody we meet they don't bat an eye move on with their lives it's a shitty movie you've seen you smile and i sneak a peek at your face red and glowing in the theatre light a memory so deep one i hold safe to keep all the bad times are going down round and round my little head all the bad times are going down round and round

[credits roll]